Dreams & Wishes

Dua: If you don't ask, then how will He answer?
{photo credit: heartofdua site}

I’m not one who dreams every night in my sleep.  The few that I do dream, from the moment I realize I’m waking up, I try to grasp the quickly fading message – words, feel, & vision – chasing after it reluctantly, knowing I have little time while being  pulled forward by the strong hands of  consciousness into the new day.  And after opening my eyes, I usually try to blow off the cobwebs that come along with it, so that I can clearly understand the significance of that rare dream I had managed to hold onto.  

“Me-meow… Meooow” came the repeated attempts of Zumar (Masha’Allah our beloved 5 month old kitten) yesterday, trying to wake me up at exactly the same time that he always does.  Within seconds, his meows grew louder, while the images and the voice started to fade into dark silence.  I opened my eyes to find the little sweetheart inches away from my face watching me with his big hazel eyes. 

“Assalamu-alaikum আমার যান (read as: amar jaan)! ‘Peace be upon you my love!' Assalamu-alaikum Zumar!”

As always Zumar did his happy prance and a tiny “meorrp”, before putting his wet, pink nose on my nose as his reply, and then rubbed his face affectionately on my face - that being his hug.  

I tried to recall the already blurry image that I was still holding onto that I could now feel slipping away from my grasp.  While standing by the window, I slowly pulled the blinds open to let in the sunlight, and started to wipe away the haze in my mind in order to remember the dream.  It was something important, I know. Bits and pieces still floated around in my mind, and didn't quite fall into its proper place yet.  

"Hmm, maybe I need my coffee first", I thought groggily.  

But I continued to jog my memory without the jolt of the much needed caffeine. The room had now filled up with the rays of the morning sun, consuming it with its golden warmth.  But, a part of the ray must've touched the dusty jewel I was grasping onto - at the right angle to give it that sparkle it needed to be recognized.  Because I suddenly and fully remembered I had dreamt of a voice telling me to “Remember to send peace and blessings upon Muhammad (s.a.w)”. 

The significance of that message, and the virtues of invoking salutation and peace upon Muhammad (s.a.w) is that the last Messenger of Allah, Muhammad (s.a.w) is the greatest benefactor of humanity and a source of guidance for all Muslims. Thus, loving him is an essential part of faith, and it is part of his right to receive peace and blessings from his ummah. 

Al-Q'uran: 
"Surely Allah and His angels bless the Prophet; O you who believe! call for (Divine) blessings on him and salute him with a (becoming) salutation." {Surah Al-Ahzab 'The Coalition' 33:56}

Hadith: 
Towards the end of time, hardly any dreams will be untrue. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allahbe upon him) said: “That will be because the Prophethood and its effects will be so far away in time, so the believers will be given some compensation in the form of dreams which will bring them some good news or will help them to be patient and steadfast in their faith.” {al-Bukhaari, 6499; Muslim, 4200}

The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “Dreams are of three types: a dream from Allah, a dream which causes distress and which comes from the Shaytaan, and a dream which comes from what a person thinks about when he is awake, and he sees it when he is asleep.” {al-Bukhaari, 6499; Muslim, 4200}

It was narrated that ‘Abd-Allaah said: the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Allaah has angels who travel about the earth, conveying to me the salaams of my ummah.” {Saheeh Sunan al-Nasaa’i, 1215; al-Silsilat al-Saheehah, 2853}

It was narrated from Abu Hurayrah that the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “There is no one who sends salaams upon me, but Allaah will restore to me my soul so that I may return his salaams." {Saheeh Sunan Abi Dawood, 1795}

Occassions to Invoke Salutations & Blessings:  There are no restrictions of time, place, or any special requirements for sending peace and blessings on the Prophet (s.a.w)
“•No matter when or where a believer supplicates for blessings and peace on the Prophet [saw], it is delivered to him {Musnad Ahmed}
• The Prophet [saw] has taught us to send peace and blessings upon him in the last part (tashahhud) of the salaah {Jami’ Tirmidhi}
• It is prescribed (masnoon) to send peace and blessings upon the Messenger of Allah [saw] after the second takbeer of the funeral prayers {Musnad Shaf’i} 
• Sending peace and blessings upon the Prophet [saw] after hearing the call to prayer (Azaan) and before making supplications is a means of receiving ten blessings from Allah {Sahih Muslim}
• Supplications for the Prophet [saw] made on Fridays are presented to him. {Sahih al-Jami’ as-Sagheer}
• The etiquette of making supplications, which have a greater likelihood of acceptance, is to first praise Allah , then send peace and blessings upon the Prophet [saw] and then supplicate {Jami’ Tirmidhi} 
• It is recommended (masnoon) to send blessings upon the Prophet of Allah [saw] in every gathering because gatherings where this is not done may become a means of chastisement from Allah {Jami’ Tirmidhi}
• Sending blessings on the Prophet [saw] ten times in the morning and ten times in the evening will be a source of intercession on the Day of Judgment {Sahih al-Jami’ as-Sagheer}
 
• It is recommended to send blessings on the Prophet [saw] at the beginning of sermons and preaching, at gathering of learning (especially when ahadith of the Prophet [saw] are being taught), at the time of engagement or marriage, when writing and at the beginning of every righteous deed.”  All this will be a cause for attaining Allah’s pleasure and mercy and facilitate the task at hand."

Benefits of Invoking Salutation & Blessings upon Muhammad (s.a.w):

“Elevation of Status
: Anas bin Malik ؓ relates that the Prophet [saw] said, “He who sends blessings on me once Allah sends blessings on him ten times and removes from him ten sins and raises him by ten degrees.” {Sunan Nasai}

Worthy of Intercession: 
Abu al-Darda’ ؓ relates that the Messenger of Allah [saw] said, “Whoever sends blessings on me ten times in the morning and ten times in the evening will have my intercession on the Day of Judgment.”
 {Sahih al-Jami’ as-Sagheer}

Relief from Misery and Sorrow: 
Ubayy bin Ka`b ؓ relates: I said, “O Messenger of Allah [saw], I send much blessings on you. What proportion of my prayer should I devote to (sending blessings on) you?” He said, “As much as you like.”
I said, “A quarter?” He said, “As much as you like, and if you increased it would only be better for you.”
I said, “Then a half?” He said, “As much as you like and if you increased then it would only be better for you.”
I said, “Then two thirds?” He said, “As much as you like and if you increased it would only be better for you.”
I said, “I’ll devote all of my prayers to sending blessings on you.” The Prophet [saw] said, “In that case it will suffice you from your worries and your sins will be forgiven.”
 {Jami’ Tirmidhi}

Source of Blessings
: ‘Abdurrahman bin ‘Auf ؓ relates that the Messenger of Allah [saw] went out once and he followed him until he entered a grove of palm trees and prostrated. His prostration was so long that ‘Abdurrahman feared that Allah had taken his soul. ‘Abdurrahman came to look at him and he raised his head and said: “What is wrong, Abdurrahman?” Abdurrahman mentioned what had happened, and the Prophet [saw] said: “Gabriel ؑ came to me and said: ‘Shall I not give you glad tidings? Allah says to you, “Whoever sends blessings upon you, I confer blessings upon him. Whoever sends salutations to you, I send peace on him.”’ Therefore, I prostrated to Allah in thanks”.
 {Musnad Ahmed and Al-Hakim}

Acceptance of Supplications:
 Abdullah bin Mas’ud ؓ narrates: I was once praying, and the Prophet [saw], Abu Bakrؓ and Umar ؓ (were all present). When I sat down (in the final tashahhud), I praised Allah, then sent salaams on the Prophet [saw], then started praying for myself. At this, the Prophet [saw] said:
‘Ask (in this manner) and you shall be given! Ask, and you shall be given it!’
 {Jami’ Tirmidhi}

Increase in Reward
: Abu Huraira ؓ relates that the Prophet [saw] said, “Whoever sends blessings on me once, Allah writes ten good deeds in his book of deeds.” {Fadal as-Salaah ala an-Nabi}”


Dua:
Sending salaams upon the Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w) may be done by saying “Al-salaamu ‘alayka ayyuha’l-Nabiyyu wa rahmat Allaahi wa barakaatuhu" ("Peace be upon you, O Prophet, and the mercy of Allah and His blessings)". 

It may aslo take the form of a dua, by praying that Allaah may keep him safe and sound, by saying "Sal Allaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam" ("May Allah Send blessings and peace upon him [i.e., the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him))".  {Dabaa’i’ al-Fawaa’id, 2/143} 

The "Welcome" Doormat

For the past two weeks, I’ve had the blessing of entertaining a bit of guests at our home.  I stress the blessing part, which you’ll understand at the end.  

I grew up in a nuclear family with not many extended relatives living in the same city.  Our closest people were the “Uncles & Aunties” and the kids of all the family-friends of my parents.  Since very young, it was almost painfully forged onto my brain with a hot iron rod being my parents’ stern voices, that weekdays were strictly comprised of school and nothing else. 

“But what about my social life?” I in the midst of annoyance, naively blurted out to my mother one day.

“What social life?” she roared.  “All you’re required to do at this age is study. And absolutely nothing else” she almost hissed out the words. 

She stared me down, until I walked away backwards, believing that any moment now the smoke detector would go off above her head. Figuratively speaking.  So, needless to say, the amount of guests trafficking at our house was very limited on weekdays due to its mega potential of it believing to be a source of interference - something that would compromise with a good report card at the end of the school year. 

That is why, even to this day… Whenever I hear of people coming to visit my husband & I – I have a mini panic (almost a cardiac) attack.  I stress about how everything has to look perfect, and there has to be a ton of food in beautiful culinary presentations. I literally start a mini timed sprint around the house as though I’m being judged on Food Network’s “Chopped” & HGTV’s “Design Star” all at the same time.  Part of that obsessive-compulsive trait is partly environmental & partly genetic on my end because I’m somewhat of a “neat freak”, perfectionist like my mother. I need everything – all the planets, stars, moon, sun, food, mood, ambience, & clothing… ALL to be in perfect harmony when people are over. Yeah, right?  I know!  That’s impossible and thus, stressful when trying to achieve such high standards that I irrationally set for myself.

But, somewhere in between my sprint, over the hum of my sweet husband’s constant reassuring words, and probably when I’ve stopped to drink some water while listening to him – both of which works to seep sense into me…There’s a moment. The moment I realize that I just need to relax, give it my best,  leave the rest to Allah...and exhale.  

Age allows you to get very comfortable with reaching that balance, and proud acceptance of who you are and the way you go about it.  I now fully realize that more than the influence of genes or the environment I grew-up in… kindness & compassion were always my biggest innate influence that I was blessed with.  I'm glad that I've never cared to please anyone just for the sake of being in their “good books” and have never been afraid to stand up for what I believed in.  The sole drive for me to be kind was always and only because of that nagging ache in my chest that would start whenever I would learn of anyone or any animal in need of anything. I would obsessively think about ways of how I can help them or know someone that can, and compulsively attempt for it. My parents, grandparents, and others can vouch for the amount of time I’ve showed up with stray animals in the house knowing that I wouldn’t be allowed to keep them. But the thought of even one night of shelter at my house for those innocent souls, was worth all the over-dramatic, angry, spiteful words and reactions from them.

Kindness... (no matter how hard) - Pass it on!

With regards to religious responsibilities – the duty of kindness, compassion, and generosity is prescribed to every believing Muslim and isfardh - Islamic "must". No matter how small or great the act is.  That is why even a smile is considered charity and a tear is considered a sadaqa.   Thus,honoring guests is regarded in Islam as a great deed because it is part of giving alms or being kind.  Guests are anyone – human or any other creature – that has come intentionally or accidently knocking at your door in need of shelter, food, company or any other favor. The duty towards them is great, as mentioned in the following hadith,

Allah’s Messenger (pbuh) said, “Whoever believes in Allah and the Last Day, let him honor his guest by giving him his reward.” They asked, “What is his reward, O’ Messenger of Allah?” He said, “One day and one night.  The right of hospitality is three days, and anything beyond that is an act of charity.” {Bukhari & Muslim} 


Honoring a guest – from the moment they knock and enter your house – is not a matter of choice to be followed.  The “reward” of the guest is one day and one night, while the duty of hospitality of the host is three days, and anything beyond that is an act of charity, which will be recorded among the suab (good deeds) of the generous host.  


That is why, I was blessed to carry out my fardh, and (given more reasons to) please Allah these past weeks.  So the next time, whether you're expecting or get that surprise knock on the door and you start to hyperventilate… Just stop, and remind yourself that it doesn’t matter how glamorous or bland the outcome seems from the outside. When accommodating guests, its not about spending beyond your means, making the house sparkle, cooking one too many dishes, worrying about if there will be enough food, burning yourself out or being wasteful with extravagance. When we roll out the "welcome" mat - its about the simple acts of kindness that you bestow upon people from the moment they step across the doormat and set foot into your house.  Remember that this is your chance to strengthen social ties, practice charity, generosity, follow the teachings of Islam, and have fun while being a good Muslim.  As long as we were sincere in our attempts of being a generous host, and was able to provide the warmth of our smile, hugs, words, food, an extra place for that person to rest, and was sure to never remind them of that favor…then, that's all that counts. Your good intentions, is all that counts.

People will be able to tell the sincerity of your intentions… not because you’ll “beat your own drum” (which is a complete “no no” in Islamic rules and etiquette), but because your guests will feel the immensity of your warmth.  Gratitude is their responsibility, and not your worry – so do not seek it.  Your reward at the end is going to be that feeling…  That feeling which polishes your soul brighter, as you’re blessed with the realization that Allah is Pleased with you for your goodness.  And that’s what it is really about every single day on this planet. 

Al Qu'ran

“So woe to the praying ones,

Who are unmindful of their prayer!
Who do good to be seen,
And refrain from acts of kindness.” {Surah Al-M’aun: (The (Small) Acts of Kindness) 107:4-7}

“And whatever good thing you spend, it is to your own good; and you do not spend but to seek Allah’s pleasure; and whatever good things you spend shall be paid back to you in full, and you shall not be wronged.” {Surah Al-Baqara (The Cow) 2:272}

"And what will explain to you what the steep path is? 
It is the freeing of a (slave) from bondage; 
or the giving of food in a day of famine to an orphan relative, 
or to a needy in distress. 
Then will he be of those who believe, 
enjoin fortitude and encourage kindness and compassion." {Surah Al-Balad (the City) 90:12-17}

Hadith

"Verily, a man teaching his child manners is better than giving one bushel of grain in alms." {Muslim}

“There is no goodness in the one who is not hospitable” reported by Imam Ahmad, as said by Prophet (pbuh).

 Jaabir said: “I heard the Messenger of Allah (pbuh) say: ‘The food of one is enough for two, the food of two is enough for four, and the food of four is enough for eight’ “ {Muslim}


"Allah will not give mercy to anyone, except those who give mercy to other creatures." {Narrated Abdullah b. Amr, Allah’s Messenger (pbuh) said - Abu Daud & Tirmidhi}

The Holy Prophet (sas) once said: “On the day of Judgement, Allah will address a particular individual:

O Son of Adam! I was sick but you did not attend to Me. 
Bewildered, this individual will say: ‘How is that possible? You are after all the Supreme Lord of all the worlds (and cannot fall sick).’ 
Allah will reply: Do you not remember that so and so among My servants was ill and lying close to you and you did not turn to him in sympathy? If you had but gone near him, you would have found Me beside him.

In a like manner, Allah will address another individual:

O Son of Adam! I had asked you for a piece of bread; but you would not give it to Me. 
The individual will submit: ‘How is that possible? Can Allah feel hunger and need bread?’ 
Allah will reply: So and so among My servants in a moment of hunger had asked you for bread, and did you not refuse to give it to him? If you had given him food, you would have found Me beside him.

Similarly, Allah will turn to yet another and address him: O Son of Adam! I was thirsty and I asked you for a cup of water, but you did not give it to me.

The individual will cry out: ‘How is that possible? How can Allah feel thirsty?’ 
Allah will reply:  So and so of My servants were thirsty and asked you for water, but you did not give it to him. If you had given it to him, you would have found Me beside him” {Muslim}

Words of Wisdom

“I smile at my guest and make him smile before he brings in his luggage, 

As if I had plenty to offer him at the time when I am suffering hardship. 

Hospitality does not consist of piling up food in front of him;

The face of the generous man is the essence of hospitality.” {Haatime at-Taa’iyy – famous Arab poet}

“People may not remember what you did or said but they will always remember how you made them feel.” {Maya Angelou}

Alhamdulillah... I'm sitting on a smile!

This isn't the moon, but its just as great!
{Photo courtesy: m.flikie.com}

Yes, today’s one of those days. You know which one… The one where you’re feeling dragged down by the weight of all that needs to be done in life.  Where you, the superhero/heroine sees your powers and accomplishments as just plain ordinary or to best, just lacking.  Where that special cape – the face that you put on – just seems like a worn out piece of cloth.  Where your must-do list in life is dragging your fuel gauge to a notch below zero.  Ah, that must-do list…  The list that includes that career you’re aiming for but its still a long steep way to the moon, that baby you’re ready for but each month the test turns out “negative” in delivering the anticipated news, that dream house you’ve been searching for that you know is out there – but your realtor just can't see it, that much needed vacation - the thought of which at times gets you through the long working hours of the day and that you can almost feel under your feet – planted ankle-deep into the warm sand as the waves playfully lap against you at the beach - but as soon as you open your eyes, you’re back looking down to see your hands holding the dish that you’re washing – realizing that this year too, that vacation won’t be possible because you promised your kid the summer camp last year.  And the list can go on... as same disappointments in different forms.  But let’s stop to regroup and refocus our energy into the great things that are going on instead.  Let’s stop to smile at all things there are to smile about.

In order to look forward, we at times need to turn around and look at the long beaten path behind us.   Just how much have you accomplished already in this short life - no matter your age - in order to stand here? So what that you’re not exactly at that spot in your career by now as you planned?  Atleast you made it through grad school, or highschool, or even that crazy subject that you “just knew” that you won’t pass cause you were so sure that “Mr. T hates me and caught me snoozing in class once”.  But you did! So what, that your pregnancy test is taking its time to give the “positive” news?  Atleast you’re blessed with so much love for your spouse whom you can’t wait to have a child with.  So what, that your dream house doesn’t seem to exist exactly like you envisioned it, out there? Atleast, you’re in the financial position to have the option to choose where you live whereas many people in the world don’t even own the sidewalks that they sleep on.  And so what that this year too you’re not seeing a time-slot open to be able to take that dream vacation you’ve been planning for years? Take a weekend to yourself or share it with your loved one, while having your child(ren) spend the weekend at a friend’s or a caring relative’s!  And make the most – as you would on your vacation, out of those two days.  Atleast your hands are full (with love) instead of being empty with needs, loneliness, and regrets. 

Every single day when we wake up, we choose whether it’ll be a good one or not. Yes, that obnoxious passenger on the public transport screaming all the words of the profanity dictionary on his phone, your boss’s “I’m feeling under the weather and now must make you pay” attitude, or that angry venting customer that came to complain about the world and today you just don’t have the upbeat energy for it… might be factors too.  But realize that they’re just having a bad day, and you won’t let that define your day as bad too.  Learn to not sweat the small stuff.  So, as I was saying… the only way we choose a good day is by being grateful for all the good that we have, and believing the stuff that we don’t… will eventually come if Allah Wills.  For He Alone Knows what is best for you.  So tomorrow, as you wake up and feel the blues hanging heavy onto your legs and preventing that skip to your step… When Shaytan tries to ruin your day with showing you all the stuff to feel sad and stressed about, punch him! That’s right… I said it!  Hit him where it hurts, by simply… remembering Allah.  Be grateful!  Remember Allah – whether by talking to him, taking His Name, a recited surah, or through formal dua in namaz.  And Allah will calm the troubled waves that started to churn in your soul, and will Remind you of all the blessings that He has Provided you with all around you… Till you start to lose count.  And that’s when you’ll feel the clouds part to make room for His light in you again. 

So put on that “cape” of gratitude and continue to fly through your amazing life, and be that hero/ine that you are – to atleast that one person (that has popped up in your head right now) – that you are to!  Enjoy all the little stops along your journey to your “moon”… your goals.  Yes, today was a day when a “super-hero/ine” as you needed some refueling.  So what?  Your blessings are countless - and more follows with each time you give gratitude.  So, grab a handful on your way out and fuel your soul with Allah’s light! 

Al Qur'an:
“Allah is the light of the heavens and the earth; a likeness of His light is as a niche in which is a lamp, the lamp is in a glass, (and) the glass is as it were a brightly shining start, lit from a blessed olive-tree, neither eastern nor western, the oil whereof almost gives light though fire touch it not – light upon light – Allah guides to His light whom He pleases, and Allah sets forth parables for men, and Allah is Cognizant of all things.” {Surah An-Noor 24:35}

“And if you would count Allah’s favors, you will not be able to number them; most surely Allah is Forgiving, Merciful.” {Surah An-Nahl 16:18}

“Whoever does good whether male or female and he is a believer, We will most certainly make him live a happy life, and We will most certainly give them their reward for the best of what they did.
So when you recite the Quran, seek refuge with Allah from the accursed Shaitan,
Surely he has no authority over those who believe and rely on their Lord.” {Surah An-Nahl 16:97-99}

“Unquestionably, by the remembrance of Allah hearts are assured.” {Surah Ar-Rad 13:28}

“And [remember] when your Lord proclaimed, ‘If you are grateful, I will surely increase you [in favor]…” {Surah Ibrahim 14:7}

 The time when prayers were answered for Prophet Ibrahim (pbuh) no matter his age…

“And inform them of the guest of Ibrahim: When they entered upon him, they said, Peace. He said: Surely we are afraid of you. They said: Be not afraid, surely we give you the good news of a boy, possessing knowledge.  He said: Do you give me good news (of a son) when old age has come upon me? Of what then do you give me good news!  They said: We give you good news with truth, therefore be not of the despairing.” {Surah Al-Hijr 15:51-55}

Hadith:
Abu Huraira (r) reported: The Messenger of Allah صلى الله عليه وسلم (pbuh) said, “Look to those with a lesser status than you and do not look to those with a higher status, lest the favors of Allah seem insignificant to you.” {Sahih Muslim, Book 42, number 7070}

The Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم  (pbuh) said: “Do not talk too much without remembering and mentioning Allah, for too much talk without mentioning Allah hardens the heart, and the person farthest from Allah is the one with a hard heart.” {Tirmidhi}

“Remember Allah during times of ease and He will remember you during times of difficulty” {Tirmidhi}

Dua:
Ibn ‘Abbas (r) reported, “The Prophet, peace be upon him, at times of sorrow and grief used to supplicate, La ilaha illa Allah Al-’Azim, Al-’Alim, la ilaha illa Allah, Rabbul ‘arshil ‘Azim, la ilaha illa Allahu, Rabbus-Samawati wa rabbul ardi wa rabbul ‘arshi karim (There is no god but Allah, the Mighty, the Forbearing, there is no god but Allah, the Lord of the mighty throne, there is no god but Allah, the Lord of the heavens and the earth, and the Lord of the throne of honor)’.” {Bukhari and Muslim}


Anas (r) said that when the Prophet, peace be upon him, was faced with a serious difficulty, he would always supplicate, “Ya Hayyu, ya Qayyumu, bi-rahmatika astaghithu (O the Living, O the Eternal, I seek help in Your grace). 
{Tirmidhi}

Abu Hurairah (r) reported that whenever the Prophet, peace be upon him, was faced with a serious difficulty, he would raise his head to the sky and supplicate, “Subhan-Allah al-’Azim (glory be to Allah, the Mighty).” And when he implored seriously and strongly, he would say “Ya Hayyu, Ya Qayyum (O the Living, the Eternal One).”
 {Tirmidhi}

Abu Bakr (r) reported that the Prophet, peace be upon him, said, “The supplications of distress are, ‘Allahumma rahmataka arju, fala takilni ila nafsi tarfata ‘ain, wa aslih li sha’ni kullahu, la ilaha illa anta (O Allah, I hope for Your mercy, so give me not over to my self even for as little as wink of an eye, and set right all my affairs, there is no god but You).”
 {Abu Daw’ud}


Words of Wisdom:
"Blessed are those that can give without remembering and receive without forgetting.” {Anonymous}

"There is a calmness to a life lived in Gratitude, a quiet joy." {Ralph H. Blum}

Sing & Dance In The Rain

 "I'm singin' in the rain" Klaud Weiss
{Photo courtesy Klaud Weiss}

My husband and I had just finished coming back to bed after praying Fazr salath and just as we were about to fall asleep, we got startled when his cellphone rang out that early in the morning.  By the time he got to answering it, the caller had already left a voice mail.  

“Kkk…kaku” sobbed the male voice over the loudspeaker.  “Kaku…” he repeated. “Ami deshey choley jacchi.  Amma mara gechey”.  Translation…“Uncle, I’m going back home. Mom has passed away”.

We both stared at the phone for a few seconds absorbing the news, and then quickly remembered to say  “Inna lil lahi, wa inna ilaihi rajiun” meaning 'Surely we belong to God and to Him shall we return' (Quran 1:156).  After calling his cousin’s teenage son back and trying to comfort him as best as he knew how, for my husband too had lost a parent - his father, almost six years back - he came to join me at the living-room couch.  The sun was starting to come up now and we both stared passed our glass patio door at the beautiful orange and blue unveiling of the night sky to announce the coming day, just beyond all the green of the trees ahead. How magnificently light manages to rationalize and dismiss our darkest fears!

He almost whispered, “I’m feeling so incredibly sad”. 

“I know honey” I paused… “Alhamdulillah though.  Just imagine how lucky you and I are – to be given one more day to wake-up.  One more day to try to do good and undo any of the bad that we’ve done” I said to him, while he took my hand in his and nodded slowly in agreement. 

“Yeah, but… tomorrow I can be on the other side of that line sobbing for my mother”. And we both sat quietly for a while knowing the reply to that.  It can be any of us reaching out to our close ones, on the other side of that line, mourning the loss of a loved one. 

Sometimes we tend to have a carefree outlook that our “clock” isn’t ticking, and only the other person's are. Maybe its the mature ego defence of "suppression" in order to voluntarily withhold some unacceptable thought in order to go on happily in life.  Or maybe its just plain forgetfulness, when we hear that someone young has passed away, we often enough are shocked and exclaim, 

“But he was so young!”.  

We forget that we all - no matter what our age or our condition – have a ticker on us called the heart, just beating away. At times thumping with sorrow, other times beating happily,  pounding passionately away…and while at other times, just quietly ticking.  But this post isn't about death... Its the reminder of life!  But one cannot talk about the other, without mentioning both.  Just as one cannot think of darkness without remembering the absence and value of light.  

We’ve all mourned the loss of someone – human or animal – close to us… whether by death, or other form of painful separation – an ache which isn’t a stranger, but a generous friend in many faces - that spares none of us its many visits.  Its only human to mourn and shed tears when faced with grief,  and was best adviced by a noble Moroccan Shaykh (may Allah bless and preserve him) saying that, ‘weeping is a prayer that will surely be answered’.  But we should also remember through such trying times as prescribed by Islam, not to act bewildered, erratic, and say anything that will displease or insult the Creator.  We have to practice Sabr – the Islamic virtue of “patience” or “endurance” as one of the two parts of faith (the other being Shukr meaning “gratitude”). Each of our souls were sent here when He Wanted, and will be taken back When He Wills.   No matter what we might believe, we belong to not even ourselves, other than to Him.  And the only surety of life for anyone - is death.  While the biggest un-surety is whether we will wake-up to see another day, or be given another chance at it – to do better, be better than yesterday.  That’s why at the hearing of the passage of another departed soul – we should be humbled as close to the ground as possible while striving to go about life the way we would want to be recalled, remembered with fondness and laughs, missed with tears out of pure love, and prayed for with utter sincerity.  

Let’s strive each day to make it so great that when we meet Our Maker, we can stand in front of Him humbly without fear and with Him Smiling.  So that we can account for what we did with that beautiful vessel, our body - in which He sent the Angels to Blow our souls into – account for every action, words spoken, tears shed, and silence held – by each one of us.  How can you deny any of the accounts – when it was He Who Watched you when you took your first steps and Watched on as you took every step after that, till you came to a stop at the end of the path leading upto Him?  

So, even though He Knows already… Have a great story waiting, which you can’t wait to tell Him.  Go ahead…Tell Him how you sang and danced in the rain, through the storms instead of running for the shade... Just as you did through the storms of life that He Tested you with.  And in the meantime, maybe while Waiting for you to reach Him, even Allah will have to Take a peak again and again at the end of your story – just like you would do if you were to re-read a favorite storybook of yours - which you couldn’t wait to get to the end of.

Al Qur'an:
“Wherever you are, death will find you out, even if you are in towers built up strong and high!...” {Surah An-Nisa 4:78}


“It is God that takes the souls (of men) at death; and those that die not (He takes) during their sleep: those on whom He has passed the decree of death, He keeps back (from returning to life) but the rest He sends (to their bodies) for a term appointed. Verily in this are Signs for those who reflect.” {Quran: Surah Al-Zumar 39:42}

Hadith:
“Narrated by Ibn Umar (radiAllahu anhu) that the Messenger of Allah (pbuh) said: "Increase your remembrance of the One which defeats pleasures" In this regard to life and death - our beloved Prophet (pbuh) said:  ''Do for your life as if you are to live eternally, and do for the hereafter as if you are to die tomorrow. ''

“Sa’d ibn ‘Ubadah (radiAllahu anhu) fell ill with some complaint that he suffered from, and the Prophet (pbuh) came to visit him, accompanied by some of his companions.  When he entered and found him in a coma, he asked, ‘Has he passed away?’ They said, ‘No, O’ Messenger of Allah.’  The Messenger (pbuh) of Allah wept, and when the people saw him weeping, they wept too.  He said, ‘Are you not listening?  Allah will not punish a man for the tears that fall from his eyes or for the grief that he feels in his heart, but He will either punish or have mercy on a man because of this,’ and he pointed to his to his tongue.” {narrated by ‘Abdullah ibn ‘Umar; Bukhari and Muslim}

The Prophet (pbuh) wept as his son Ibrahim (ra) passed away, and said to the Companions when they were surprised by this:
‘Not this do I forbid. These are the promptings of tenderness and mercy, and he that is not merciful; unto him shall no mercy be shown. O Ibrahim, if it were not that the promise of reunion is sure, and that this is a path which all must tread, and that the last of us shall overtake the first, verily we should grieve for you with a yet greater sorrow. Yet, we are stricken indeed with sorrow for you, O Ibrahim. The eye weeps, and the heart grieves, nor say we anything that would offend the Lord.’

Words of Wisdom:
“The greatest use of a life is to spend it for something that will outlast it.” {Anonymous}


“Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass,
It’s about dancing in the rain” {Anonymous}

Spring Cleaning

Making Space For Something Better
{Picture courtesy: http://files.myopera.com/hazanmakami/blog}

Our 4 month old kitten, Zumar, is terrified of the vacuum cleaner.  Whenever he sees the blue machine coming out of the closet, I don’t have enough time to uncoil the wire and plug it in, before turning to watch Zumar run off every single time to our bedroom.  And that’s where he’ll stay until its all done with and till I announce in a sing-song tone “Zumi, shesh!!!”. Translation of the Bangla… “Zumi, its done!!!”.  Only then, he’ll come out of his hiding from behind our bed.

While vacuuming last Saturday evening (yes, I know…  Its just that we were home, and while my darling husband was busy with some official work on the computer, I thought that I might as well get it over with then), as I entered our bedroom – I caught Zumar peering out from behind our bed to confirm his worst fear, as he watched me rolling in the vacuum cleaner. So I said,
“Zumi, this is for your own good… You just don’t know it now. Don’t be scared, it’ll all be over soon baby.  I promise.”

Right after I finished assuring him, it came to me…

Sometimes, some things get taken away from us that holds great value at that point in our lives. We get into the habit of the comfort of having it around, and just as soon as we settle into it like a warm, worn-out blanket, we’re thrown into having to adapt to an unfamiliar environment with its absence.  At that very moment – we have the choice of being terrified and worry about everything that's going on, or feel the fear but be brave enough to be patient and calm while surrendering to the reality that there are things beyond our comprehension and control.  Those are the things that we trust and allow Allah (or your choice of “Higher Being”) to “clean up” for us.  That thing, that we thought best for us but instead there's something, as they say "bigger and better" for us still.  So, in order to make room for that better something, this has to be taken away.  

As I told Zumar... You just don't know it now, but it'll all be over soon. Don't be scared. Maybe Zumar didn't understand all the words spoken, but he surely understood the tone...which sounded the same as when I tell him "Zumi, I love you". If you can silence your fear just enough to listen to the tone...you'll hear it.  Whoever it is - that is the Guardian of your well-being... loves you enough to give you only what is the best for you.

Al Qur'an: 
“And Allah sends down rain from the skies, and gives therewith life to the earth after its death: verily in this is a Sign for those who listen.” {Surah Al-Nahl 13:65 ~ Qur’an}

Hadith:

"When Allah tests you, it is never intended to destroy you. When He removes something in your possession, it is only in order to empty your hands for an even greater gift." {Ibn al-Qayyim}

Dua:
Whatever happens, when someone is patient and says the dua that the Prophet - sal Allâhu alayhi wa sallam - taught us, that person will be blessed with something better.  The Dua is as follows:  “Inna lillâhi wa inna Ilayhi râji’ûn. Allâhumma ‘jurnî fî musîbatî, wakhluf lî khayrun minh.” {Umm Salamah (radi Allâhu ‘anha} 


Words of Wisdom:

“Worry does not empty tomorrow of its sorrows, it empties today of its strength.” {Cornelia "Corrie" ten Boom}